Q&A: Can I Negotiate Without Leaving My Job?
This is the first installment of our new series, a Q&A; on negotiation! Ask our expert, She Negotiates co-founder Victoria Pynchon, your toughest negotiation questions, and get personalized advice right here!
As my friends and I get older and wiser, we're starting to realize that we didn't negotiate early on in our careers and that we need to start getting comfortable with it and good at it.
My question is this: How you can negotiate when you don't have any leverage—like when you’ve been at a company a while and you don't have a competing offer to use as a bargaining chip? For example, when I got promoted a few years ago, I tried to make the case that I deserved more than the standard 5% pay increase for a promotion, and I was simply told “no.”
This also just happened to a co-worker of mine who took a new position with another division in the company. They gave her a figure, she tried to negotiate up from there, but they held firm to their original number. Is there something we're missing? Or can you truly not get what you want unless you can actually threaten to walk away from the job or company?
Wanting to Stay (but Wanting More)
Dear Wanting to Stay,
Thank you so much for raising this question. It’s one I’m often asked—and also one I see a lot of bad advice given on in women’s publications.
I have good news for you, though. You do have negotiation power. There is a way to successfully ask for a raise , and you don’t have to threaten to walk away from your job to get it.
Because this is such a big topic, I’ll be answering your question in three segments over the course of this week, segments I hope you’ll read so that you (and others in a similar situation) can ask me clarifying questions as the week goes by.
Let’s start today with the most pressing question: Do you have “bargaining power?”
Walt Disney’s former general counsel once said that negotiation leverage belongs to the party who appears to be in the best position to walk away from a deal.
There are two key negotiation lessons embedded in this nugget of wisdom. The first is perception. If your employer believes you have the will and ability to walk away from your job—whether you actually do or not—you're much more likely to get what you what you want or, at a minimum, more than you expected.
The second point has to do with your BATNA . BATNA is an acronym for the phrase “better alternative to a negotiated agreement.” If you know there’s a higher paying alternative to your current job, you can feel pretty comfortable negotiating a raise. And you actually don't have to have a job offer in hand to use this knowledge to your benefit, nor do you have to threaten your employer with the prospect of losing you.
Your employer also has a BATNA. The moment you ask for a raise, it must weigh the costs of displeasing (or losing) you against the expense of keeping you.
The key to creating the appearance, and hence the reality, of bargaining power is knowing how much it would cost your employer to replace you, helping your employer understand your true market value, and asking for that value in a way that does not invite an irritable response.
Here’s the bottom line: You have bargaining power if you cannot be easily replaced. It’s as simple as that. Most women underestimate their value and exaggerate their employer’s ability to easily replace them. I’m wagering that you could not be easily replaced for some or all of the following reasons:
If just one or two of these assumptions apply to you, you have considerable bargaining power to seek a raise. The only question now is how best to deploy it. And that’s what we’ll cover on Wednesday.
Photo courtesy of Mark Warner .
Victoria Pynchon is an attorney who practiced commercial litigation for 25 years. Since 2004, she has been mediating and arbitrating commercial disputes—the former with ADR Services, Inc. in Century City and the latter with the American Arbitration Association in Los Angeles. In 2010, she founded She Negotiates Consulting and Training with her business partner Lisa Gates. In 2006, Victoria earned her legal masters degree in Dispute Resolution. She has been teaching negotiation and providing negotiation consulting services to lawyers, executives, professionals and entrepreneurs ever since. She is the author of two books, The Grownups' ABCs of Conflict Resolution (2010) and Success as a Mediator for Dummies (2012).More from this Author