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Advice / Succeeding at Work / Break Room

What Does Your Desk Say About You?

Desk presentation says everything about a person.

Organization style, personal preferences, and professional circumstances abound in every mug of coffee you abandon (or immediately rush to the sink to wash). So what exactly do your pen alignment, predilection for pastel desk accessories, or photo choices say about you?

Glad you asked.


1. You Have a Colored Stapler

You clock a lot of time on lifestyle blogs and have daydreamed about turning your robust Instagram following into some kind of a business. You’ve been known to take the exact same photo of your sunglasses next to your Starbucks cup about 50 times (and then make ample use of four to five filters).

You probably also organize the office holiday party and send reminder emails about colleagues’ birthdays. Bless you.


2. You Have a Physical To-Do List

You find something tremendously satisfying in physically crossing off tasks — which makes you quite practical. You prefer physical books to e-books, cooking to eating out, watching movies on Netflix over going to the movies, and a sensible work uniform over trendy garments.

People are constantly asking you for wine suggestions and book recommendations. Some would call you a snob, but you’re just a lady who knows what she likes.


3. You Have Several Dirty Coffee Mugs

You tend to experience a lot of early-morning drama before work: bad commutes, a testy partner, passive-aggressive roommates, feral children, and/or full-on texting fights. It may be 8 AM, but you’ve already had an entire story arc on getting to work—and you’re going to tell everyone about it, play by play.

On the bright side, you’re an expert at navigating work while hungover and keep an extra shirt/dress/pair of shoes in your desk, Don Draper style. You also know all the best happy hour spots.


4. You Have Every Pen in Every Color

You’re type A and very up front about it. You’re proud of your 50+ boards on Pinterest, and you don’t really understand why certain people in the office aren’t following you. Their loss, clearly.

You know how to make gluten-free cookies off the top of your head and you’ll defend quinoa pancakes. You’ve considered color-coding your bookshelves (because it would look cool) and you get annoyed when you’re the only one who contributes in a meeting. But you secretly like it.


5. You Have, Like, One Pen and Nothing Else

This is a crap job and you’re looking to get out ASAP. You’re sending out resumes on your lunch break and emailing job listings to yourself every afternoon. You’re networking like nobody’s business and maintaining your LinkedIn like a finely manicured lawn. You’re coping with yoga or meditation or coffee or inspirational quotes and trying to do this one day at a time.

Occasionally you’ve cried in the bathroom, but you’ve pulled it together because you’re a boss.


6. You Have Pictures of Cats

You’re the self-proclaimed office quirky girl with Zooey Deschanel bangs, who speaks in internet memes and updates everyone on Beyoncé’s Instagram. You probably work in social media (because it’s rife with cats!) or some other type of marketing where you can be as weird as you want and call it “branding.”

You like statement necklaces, patterned tights, and watching colleagues underestimate you just because you wear girly dresses. You’re a shark in negotiation because nobody suspects you—and you have a tendency to use uptalk to your advantage. Suckers.


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Photo of organized desk courtesy of Shutterstock.